When my mother was being treated for cancer and I was her caregiver, I had the good fortune to meet some amazing people. Some were medical personnel, but most were patients and family members. Everyone has a story, but some stories are better than others. Why? Because they inspire us to do more and to be more. Along the road to life, there are many heroes who started out as ordinary people. As they battled cancer, sometimes over decades, they began to learn things about their disease, as did their caregivers. How you approach cancer management matters.
One thing I gained from having access to so many cancer patients and their caregivers over the years was reinforced by my own early experiences in working with pediatric cancer patients. With cancer, you have to keep hope alive. Make time to play when you feel good. Sometimes everything can hinge on just surviving a day longer. I learned that from little Scotty, deemed to be dying by his pediatric oncologist. I was called in to say my goodbyes because little Scotty wasn't expected to survive the weekend. As I sat with him in the ICU, I threw caution to the wind. I put aside his terminal diagnosis and I embraced the moment. Having pulled out my compact mirror to check my reflection, I was surprised by little Scotty's request. Could he put makeup on me? Who was I to say no to a dying child. By the time he was done applying eye shadow and lipstick, I looked like Snookie at the Jersey Shore. And therein lies the magic of living in the moment. Scotty laughed at the sight of me, and the sound of his laughter was contagious. Whatever was to come didn't matter. Scotty was having fun. He was being a child, even when the chemotherapy made him feel as sick as a dog. Soon he was into remission, back to being a rambunctious five-year-old with a silly streak a mile wide.
Do I suggest that his recovery was a miracle? No. I believe it was a combination of good oncology, good care by his family, and the chance to forget about the cancer long enough to be a kid again. Every cancer patient regular "fugetaboutit" time, when you put aside the disease and get back to who you are. There are hopes, dreams, plans, desires to be fulfilled.
When cancer caregivers understand that there are common tasks and strategies for helping their loved ones better manage their lives with cancer, that's when good things happen. Learning to live in the here-and-now, understanding that we have these moments to enjoy and we shouldn't waste them -- that's when good things happen. When we take our loved ones to cancer treatment and then take them out for fun, that's when good things happen. Treat the disease and then feed the soul.
That's why I created the free caregiver ebooks -- because of all the wonderful people I met along the cancer highway, who graciously shared some important life lessons with me. But I also learned from all the people who lost their joy, who clung to misery and anger with both hands on the steering wheel. Cancer is never an easy diagnosis. There is a lot of dread and uncertainty that comes with the territory. But for everyone who rose above, who let hope live in the heart, even for a day, you were my inspiration for The Practical Caregiver Guides. It's never over until the Fat Lady sings, so Carpe Diem!
If you would like to download my free cancer caregiver ebook, "The Practical Caregiver's Guide to Cancer Care: How to Help Someone You Love", visit Smashwords:
http://www.smashwords.com/books/view/110999
If you would like more free caregiver education, video tips, and inspiration, visit The Practical Caregiver Guides:
www.practicalcaregiverguides.com
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