When Hope Fades

The hardest thing about cancer is when hope fades, when over time, there are so many complications it becomes almost impossible to stay in the battle.

Cancer can be a very tough foe. Sometimes it's exhausting to do what is necessary to live. It's like you're always running in place and getting nowhere. But when you start running backwards, it's heartbreaking, because you know you are falling behind, with no way to catch up.

I read a news report the other day about Robin Gibb of the Bee Gees, in a coma after battling what the press speculates is liver and colon cancer. What makes this most heart-wrenching is that  he declared himself cancer-free in March of 2012, after he said tests showed no signs of the disease. Over time, Robin Gibb has been like most cancer patients, running back and forth to the hospital for treatments and for medical emergencies. This time, the news doesn't look good. Pneumonia is complicating his already precarious health situation.

It comes on the heels of the premiere of his latest musical endeavor, "The Titanic Requiem", with the Royal Philharmonic Orchestra, written for the 100th anniversary of the sinking of the Titanic. Too ill to attend its premiere, it is a piece he worked on through his illness with his son, Robin-John. Like many cancer patients, having a goal to meet seems to have helped him cope.

When I was in high school, I scored my first super 8mm art film with The Bee Gees' tune, "The First of May". I recall lots of apple blossoms and sunlight in my shots. It was the first time I ever learned how to splice and edit film. Years later, I danced the night away under the sparkle of a disco ball, as the Bee Gees sang "Staying Alive". I once even saw them in concert in Passaic, NJ. For me, the Bee Gees were a part of the good times and bad times in my life, a way to recall the memories through song.

Celebrities are often larger-than-life characters, never quite real, but when they get cancer, they become very human. That's because those of us who have loved ones with the disease, or who have lost loved ones, know the toll on the human heart. Cancer is the great uniter. We understand the struggle, so we offer our hopes and prayers to our brothers and sisters, even those we don't know.

Cancer sometimes creates so many obstacles that it is almost impossible for the body to make progress. Sometimes, just when you think you have the disease licked, just when you think things are turning around, those complications turn everything upside down and you get slammed into a brick wall. That's when the soul starts to give up, to say enough is enough.

I've known cancer patients through the years. Some were supposed to be just fine and they suddenly succumbed to the complications of the disease. Others, who were expected to die, somehow managed to survive. It's not always easy to predict the course of cancer on the body. Sometimes there are vulnerabilities that don't show up on a scan or x-ray. Sometimes things happen over which we have no control.

Hope is very often the first casualty in the battle with cancer. When hope fades, things seem to quickly spiral out of control, crashing down around our feet. That's because we need hope to find the courage and inner strength to fight cancer.

Sometimes we find hope in the strangest of places -- in the words of a stranger, in a sunbeam streaming through a window, or within the heart, in a moment of sudden clarity, when we know whatever happens, it happens for the best. We've done all we can and it's time to let go and let God take the helm. It's that sense of peace that we so desperately need. That's the sound of love rising up, reminding us that we are not alone, that there are people who love us, whom we love, enriching our lives through the darkest of days. Where there is love, there is hope that whatever happens, we will get through it as we need to get through it. Seek the peace within the heart. That truly is the music in every soul, and every soul has a song. For Robin Gibb and every other cancer patient struggling, I wish you hope, courage, peace.

UPDATE: As of April 24, 2012, the media reported that Robin Gibb awakened from his coma and was communicating with his family. Still frail, diagnosed as having advanced colorectal cancer, the singer has vowed to perform again. He's not ready to give up or give in. Who knows? He may yet elbow that fat lady off the stage!

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